Monthiversaries (A Commentative Reflection)

You know what I hate?
Monthiversaries.
Wtf are those ABOUT?

This girl at the police deptartment sent out an email over the list-serve asking to get a shift covered. It went something like this: "Hi guys, I'm not going to be in town on Sunday, it's my monthiversary with my boyfriend, so I'd really appreciate it if you guys would help me out with my shifts (of which I have two)."

And then, when nobody was repsonding the way she would have like them to, she sent out another email, as such:
"PLEASE GUYS, help me out. It's my monthiversary (11 months), and it's be great if I didn't have to freak out about two shifts."

And I guess people still weren't repsonsive enough, so again:
"Please!! I only need UNEX West covered this Sunday, 1200-1815. It's my Monthiversary!! PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE!! It's a chill shift, you can study and make money at the same time... Please help me out guys."

Ok. 11 months? Are you fucking kidding me? What, you guys like celebrate every week together?"
"Oh Joe, I can't believe we made it through another week! It's so amazing! I hope we make it through another so you can buy me dinner and presents even more! Wow. Relationships are hard. They hurt my brains. I mean brain! Ha! That was funny! You see, because I said it plural but hahaha, get it?!"

Seriously. 11 months? I could understand MAYBE 6 months. Hell, Jbell and I didn't celebrate. And a MONTH certainly would never count. i'm pretty sure that even the worst of relationships would make it through a month, because even after the first few dates, a person could feel really hestitant to break up with the other. A 1-year anniversay? Sure. Why not. That's a more significant milestone at least. But what is with the random month? It's like she and her bf are so insecure about the quality and status of their realtionship that they have to celebrate everyday that they didn't break up.

Give me a break.